The Murder At the Pool

Let me tell you about the time I thought someone had been murdered at the pool and how the crazy-smart killer returned to clean up the evidence. No one noticed but me.

The pool is a great place for things like:

• Swimming
• Chatting
• Reading
• Listening to music
• Sunbathing
• Committing the perfect murder

The pool I go to is rarely that busy, yet, it's still loud as f**k with kids. I don't mind kids being kids, I just don't like being around kids and being made to appear like it's the greatest thing possible.

Since I go to the pool on, generally, the same day of the week at the same time, I see mostly the same people. Like the father who obviously spends a lot of time on his lats and probably has a "leg day" and who also parents the HELL out of his kids - and other kids.

That's a story for another time...

Here is the actual events that happened...

First, we have the lifeguard. We have a couple lifeguards, but, this guy is the only one who goes into the pool and romps around with the kids. He seems cool, earlier he had been helping a kid swim underwater for the first time. And not by holding him under until he squirmed away. He's hands-on. Talks to people. Gives out information on stuff. Probably has a moderate amount of time for someone else's sh**.

Then we have the shirted gray-haired man who arrived sometime after I did and walked to the other side of the pool where he had set up camp at one of those umbrella-table things. I think he had a kid with him. I don't know. How do you know what kid belongs to what adult? You don't.

Shortly after setting up shop, he walks on over to the lifeguard:

Shirt-Man: Do you have an bleach spray or anything?
Lifeguard: Uh, no. Why?
Shirt-Man: Someone must have gotten a bloody nose last night, there is blood all around that table
Lifeguard: What?
Shirt-Man: Probably one of the kids got a bloody nose last night at the movie night and there's patches of blood all over there. I was going to spray it down.
Lifeguard: I don't have anything, no. I didn't see anything before through.

Then the two of them walk over to the umbrella table and the man points out all these patches of blood. Blood on both sides of the table, against the pool rim, against where the pavement meets the grass. On the table. On the chair. 

I turned to my husband:

Maddie: I bet someone committed a murder here last night.
Husband: Yep.
Maddie: Are you watching this? The guy probably committed a murder and he was now cleaning up the blood in order to remove evidence.
Husband: Yep.

Plot twist - he was buried deep in his favorite book, The Deerslayer by James Fenimore Cooper. He was not concerned with the literal bloodbath only a short pool-swim away.  

Shortly after pointing out all the blood stains, Shirt-Man gathered his meager belongings and went home. For someone choosing an umbrella-table, he did not have a lot of stuff. People who bring kids to the pool tend to bring enough matched-luggage to survive for three months.

About 30 minutes later, Shirt-Man came back:

Shirt-Man: I got some cleaning solution. I told my wife about this and with my line of business, you need to clean that up
Lifeguard: Yeah, sure. Thanks, man.

While I give Shirt-Man full marks for taking such care of generally public property, the plot def thickened as he told the lifeguard - "...in my line of business..."

What is your business? Cleaning up blood? Where is your wife - "home". . .? WHY ARE YOU TELLING THE LIFEGUARD YOUR WIFE IS ALIVE?! YOU HAVE NO ALIBI!

The only logical conclusion to this situation is that he obviously murdered someone after the movie night, when the pool was open later and he had a lot of alibis around. People are tired, they didn't do extra sweep checks and once movie night was over, the pool would be the last place anyone would be. After doing the deed, he returned early the next morning to clean in up the blood. 

Killers walk among us.

Also - I have a strong suspicion is was not blood but some type of red-6 from all the snacks. Probably like a Popsicle or something. I mean, blood doesn't stay red THAT long on baking and cooling concrete. I checked.

OR COLD BLOODED MURDER

...you decide...