Fringe Thanksgiving Message

For all you who struggle to eat and struggle with food, who are equally bombarded with the classic “how not to gain weight” and “how to lose weight” from MLM schemes urging you to buy their powders and potions to keep slim and appealing.

And when you say “no” you are met with, “I wish I could be ____ as you…”

For all those whose daily life is impacted by a tricky or broken digestive system that is too graphic to talk about polity and is easily dismissed because “you don’t look sick.”

I get the frustration of this time of year when all professional “team building” and social media games consist of being asked “what’s your favorite thanksgiving food” or “what is your favorite candy” or “what is your favorite pie” to be followed up by “but if you could eat, what would it be?” in attempts to dismiss conditions and struggles to normalize everything.

For all of you out there who get that this time of the year will never be about food, and knowing how hard that is to say because the rhetoric of the season untimely means family and friends are almost equal to a green bean casserole or slice of pie and sometimes people don't understand that you cannot “just sneak a bite, real quick.”

For all of those who finally found that thing you can eat so you can sit at a table and eat with people and feel normal… and then someone say “Is that all you’re having?” or “ewww, that’s gross, I could never be happy with just that.”

For all of those who are tempted by well-meaning people who earn commission by saying they can fix you if you buy that trendy thing... but your struggle does not have a quick fix because you are not broken. You are who you are and I, for one, am perfectly ok with you.

And I get it.

I love you.

I am thankful for your bravery, your ability to smile, for your weight (whatever it is), for your courage and snark. For your humor, your perception and perspective. I am so happy when something works for you and I am so sorry when it doesn't. You are awesome and you are more than your struggle.

Mostly, I am thankful for your person and that there are culturally appropriate times to express that without the need to consume something to make it palpable. 

Happy Thanksgiving.